Act 1 of a one-act play that should never be made:
After a stunning loss in the consolation bracket’s loser championship to Farce The Music’s team, we find the general manager of Takin’ Bills in a state of stunned silence and disarray.
As our fallen hero drowns his sorrows in beer, whiskey and nachos for the next 10 months, he is awakened out of this dark point in his life, already two weeks into another football season, and sitting on a 0-2 record (again letting down his #CMchat family by falling prey to Farce the Music).
A little birdie of sunshine enters the scene via Facebook Chat…
Jessica Northey: You should do the fantasy football column again.
The Fallen Hero: Really?
JN: Yes. It was funny.
TFH: I don’t know.
JN: Do it, or I’ll release the photo of you, arm and arm with Sam Hunt and Chase Rice.
A chill overcomes The Fallen Hero…not remembering if such an occurrence actually happened…he knew what he had to do…
And welcome to this week’s installment of the Fantasy Football Hoedown. I’m here to provide you with cheap fantasy football advice and even cheaper laughs. If you’re looking for stats and breakdowns of match-ups, you are in the WRONG place. We keep it simple here.
THE INJURY BUG NOT ONLY BITES, IT SUCKS
The biggest story of the season so far has been the unrelenting rash of injuries to star players. Like most things fantasy football, this is something you have absolutely no control over. It’s how you react in the aftermath that will determine if you can make it to the playoffs. Obviously, the Cowboys have been hit the hardest as they first lost STUD wide receiver Dez Bryant in week one, and then TOP 10 quarterback Tony Romo in week two. Other teams are obviously feeling the Cowboys’ pain too. Here are some suggestions for filling the holes until your injured players return (if they are returning). I’m not guaranteeing they will all be on your waiver wire, but many are still on mine:
Quarterbacks: Andy Dalton, Tyrod Taylor, Teddy Bridgewater and Ryan Fitzpatrick should all be available in most leagues. I would have no problem using any of them as an injury or bye week replacement. Also, don’t count out Branden Weeden either (he’s got some weapons in Dallas). Hopefully, you already drafted a capable backup.
Wide Receivers: James Jones, Doug Baldwin and Terrance Williams. There’s probably not much of a chance of getting any of these three guys at this point, but if they are available and you have the need, pick them up.
Running Backs: James Starks, Danny Woodhead and Matt Jones. Woodhead and Jones are already proving their worth as role players on their respective teams. Starks is the guy to have if you own Eddie Lacy (who may or may not play on Monday).
There are a ton of players listed as Questionable this week (actually most weeks). Make sure you’re up to date on who’s active on Thursday night and Sunday afternoon (reports usually start coming in at noon) before setting your lineups. Find yourself a good news source (I personally rely on ESPN and their football reporters’ tweets).
As previously mentioned, I’m sitting in my main league without a win. Both losses were close ones filled with plenty of ifs and buts. Last week I suffered from back Luck, literally. Andrew Luck threw more picks than Eric Church after his encore. And Miami’s Defense didn’t do me any favors putting up a goose egg against Jacksonville. Really? I’m somewhat lucky (there’s that word again) that I don’t have many injuries going into this week. I’m assuming LeSean McCoy will play and am fairly certain Lamar Miller will be out there too (although I can’t imagine he’ll do well against the Bills Defense).
Unfortunately, I’m going to have to wait at least another week to get Arian Foster in my line-up. What’s that you say? Our #CMchat fantasy guy drafted a running back who was known to be out for weeks?!?! You bet I did. I was able to snag him in most of my leagues in the late rounds. I also drafted Julius Thomas, Antonio Gates (yes, I have three tight ends in this league right now) and Martavis Bryant. I believe Le’Veon Bell was drafted in the first round which was smart as he returns this week and should dominate. You have to take chances. All I know is in a couple weeks I’m going to have some big names to move and better my team.
That’s all for this week. As always feel free to hit me up on Twitter if you’re in need of any fantasy football advice.